Clearing & Healing, Chaos & Creativity

The clearing away of the old to make way for the new has definitely been happening for me……on both the home and heart front…. (amidst all that is happening in our world.)

Last week, I traversed a powerhouse series of emotional healing experiences. Talk about doing some deep inner healing and clearing work, lifetimes worth in fact. Seriously, lifetimes worth.

I’m honestly still assimilating it all.   I could feel deep deep layers moving through me and knew to seek out some assistance. That led to a profound bodywork session and a cascade of multilayered connections, emotional clearings and greater awareness for me ~ before, during and after that session.. Those insights and that energy are still assimilating… My soul definitely took the lead to show me what I needed.  There was so much that I’d been juggling for so very long. For the first time in my life, I allowed it to fully drop… I let go…. Inner constriction from trying to protect loved ones had even become an unknown hernia in my body. During my healing session, I suddenly felt as if I’d swallowed a heavy rock. The pain in my upper abdomen was suddenly acute. When that happened, my modern-day shaman soul friends and energy-healing colleagues focused in on that area.  They physically and energetically helped release the energy in my body as I emotionally and physically surrendered it.  Together, we actually unraveled and shifted the hernia within the final minutes of my hour session. That part was a briefly, acutely painful process but incredibly purposeful. My body is without any pain in that area, and now my body is starting to give me a knowing little ‘tell’ right there whenever I begin to take on the emotional energy of someone else.  I’ll definitely continue being aware and attuned to this. So yeah, last week had some very….very…deep healing and clearing.

This week provided another type of clearing process for me to move through.  My “cellular” phone and computer both began having issues. I had to shift things around and eventually seek out tech support. My iCloud back ups weren’t working properly. My phone was powering off randomly, and both devices were completely full of photos. I had to go through a clearing and ordering process to get them both working properly again. Now, after several days of archiving thousands of photos and spontaneously organizing numerous documents  from years of writing, I can honestly see the benefits of why my mobile phone went wonky and my computer hard drive began flashing me incessant “full” signs… Those tech glitches were practical and energetic prompts for me to have to go through this other clearing, organizing and honing process on a practical and creative front.

Both me and my creative tools have needed some clearing and reorganizing in this first month of this new year. The fine tuning continues there. (wink, wink)

I recognize that this recent creative reorganization process has allowed me to see all the photographic and written material that I’d already created in recent years, along with all the relationships and experiences I am blessed to have co-created.

It’s all together been one of those ‘life reviews’ while living.  Now, I have an affirming sense of “Yes…I’ve been doing THIS all along…..” I have been on my own unique path and building (inner and outer) foundations for what is to come…even when I wasn’t feeling certain that I was doing anything.

AHhhhhhh…. CHAOS is part of the CREATIVE process
….and as we breathe through those moments, clear the heaviness, do our inner work, practice trust, believe in our process, continue creating and keep working at it, we do come into the eventual streamlining times of realizations arising and creations made manifest..
Chaos & Creativity….. Clearing the old and Making way for the new….This is certainly a year for all of these energies….In my own little ah-ha moment here, I feel as if I am having a tiny validating peak behind creation’s current for the moment. Perspective on my own lil’ life is giving me a renewed faith in the entire process of life. Here’s to THAT!!
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Today, I honor it all

 

Today I honor a very personal anniversary, the 19th one in fact.   This special day marks nineteen years since passing through the portal of having cancer in my womb and enduring a sorrowful give-away at the age of 27.

What a passage it was, and continued to be, long after that fateful day nineteen years ago.  I still remember it vividly. I’m certain I always will.

What I know now is that I am a wiser woman for having had to give my womb away at such a tender age and live without the fulfillment of my dream of a second child. I am wiser for the courage it called forth in me and for the compassion it drove home in my core. It IS indeed our wounds that allow the light in and allow it in ways that we would never have dreamed of….

I may not have given birth to another child, but I did give rebirth then and many times since to this woman that lives in my body. She knows a way of loving now that is far more expansive than any body’s womb could ever have held. That give-away led to a gift that I continually give and receive now, through my way of being in life and through what I am able to give life to in other ways.

So today, for all that it carries in meaning for me, I honor it.
I light this candle and I honor it.

I honor the wisps of grief and tenderness that remain, even after nearly two decades.
I honor the dreams and the unanswered prayers.  I honor the prayers that came to be and the little life that did not.

I honor BEING alive myself, living the blessed life that I have.

I honor my husband and daughter who’ve been with me through that and much more.
I honor my family and friends who encircled me then and now.
I honor those with whom I’ve walked the path of life, whether it has been for a few moments or for many years.

I honor all the myriad of experiences, feelings, realizations, lessons and evolutions that have been lived these past nineteen of my forty-six years of this life.

I honor my own process of living, now more than ever before, and I honor the woman that I Am with all my scars, flaws, frailties, insecurities, eccentricities and uncertainties that are partnered with my continual courage, compassion, creativity, myriad talents, softness, strength, intelligence, intuition, flowing and deepening knowing.

I honor all that I continue to discover and to offer.
I honor life lived authentically and lovingly.

Today, I honor it all.

Belovedness ~ The Sacred Union

 

This creation is an invitation, a remembrance and a celebration of the sacred union within ourselves, in our relationships and in our world. I created it with a deep sense of love, multi-layered awareness and humble awe. It was first shown to a small group at our collaborative Sacred Union Evening on April 30, 2016. Today, I vulnerably share it with you.

Today, May 22, 2016, I am also offering this on my own 23rd wedding anniversary in honor of the beloved love I have found within myself, in my life, and in the connection I now share with my husband, Brian. The image of the toes touching shown in this video are our actual toes as we sat together happily at the beach this year.

And now I offer the message I placed on this video creation:

This is an intimate remembrance and a timeless, soulful invitation to sacred union. It is a call to bring honoring, mutual respect and harmonious balance to the feminine and masculine energies within us and throughout our world, one person at a time.

The song “Thousand Years” had a potent, soul resonant feel to me from the very first time I heard it…. I felt it as a beloved timeless love song between souls, an invocation from the divine, a remembrance of the inner and outer balance of the divine feminine and divine masculine and a call from the Sacred to Awaken and embody this inner marriage, this sacred union, and this balance in our world…. It is a multilayered love song across time, both divine and human. It recalls an eternal invitation to enter into this union within ourselves first and foremost and to create that sacred marriage in our intimate relationships beyond our precious selves.

For me, I hear too…. the voices of Jesus and his beloved Mary Magdalene and all the avatar beloveds across time. With these lyrics, I hear them in turn and together speak to our hearts and souls… inviting, encouraging, reminding and loving us as we walk our paths each day and take each breath and each step.

May we recognize that we are the ones we have waited for….and embody this Way of Love.

“One Step Closer……”

~ This is an offering of love. May it touch your heart.
Blessings & Profound Love, Always, DeAnne

NOTE: All artistic work (photography, artwork, images and music) shared here in this video retains all ownership and copyright by the originating artists.

Music: “Thousand Years” by Christina Perri

Photography: DeAnne Wolfgram

with select photographs from France by Joss Burnel

Artwork:

* “Waterfall Ascension of Christ & Magdalene” and “Lovers at Dolphin Bay” by Sheranda Ann Kumara

* “Alchemical Wedding Sacred Marriage” by Psychedelic Goddess Art

including other images by various artists who have and retain sole ownership of their work and all copyrights

 

Desert Goddess Deanne

Sacred soul writer Anna wrote this of and for me…… “She moves in her own way” and she moves me with eveything she writes. What a gift to see into another’s soul and write it alive to share with the world… Love you and bless you for speaking my soul language. xoxo

nuckinuk

Image

We have danced

many lifetimes

to the beat

of a shamanic 

circle

Image

drumming our

heartbeats

feet pounding

the earth

in holy 

ritualistic

trance

Image

and hypnotic

entering

of all dimensions.

Image

As fierce Spanish

lovers in

the most intense

stare as

our bodies

twist and

glide towards

each other

in a sultry

flamenco

Image

with fire

in our feet

and our hearts

burning in

longing

and passion.

Image

Guitar rising

to the desire

and matching it

note for note

step to step.

A dance of 

fusion.

Your dance

has my giddy

with excitement

and expectation.

Image

Every dance

has it’s unique

energy

though

no matter the steps

or lifetime

the connection

remains.

Image

You see yourself

so clearly

and in this

lifetime you

waited for me

to awaken.

Image

 

You are the hot desert sand

running through

and hour glass

and over my 

writhing body

the heat too much

almost as you

exfoliate and renew

my…

View original post 210 more words

HOLY, Holy, holy….

St.Sulpice

This moment and this precious sacred image called to be shared in honor of this Easter weekend 2014.

This remains one of my favorite images from my glorious divine feminine journey through France in 2012. I will never forget my solo sojourn through St. Sulpice in Paris, France days after walking in Magdalene’s footsteps.

I could sit and gaze upon this beautiful Pieta for hours… So much stirs of Beloved Love, Divine Union and a Sacred Lineage…. It is mesmerizing to behold.

 

I FEEL YOU

This IS the dawning of our Love. We sisters, our brothers, our Lovers, our circles, the Sacred Feminine, the Divine Masculine, the Sacred Union and the BELOVED connections are Awakening. 

This song is singing out for ALL OF US………

And of course, it happens to be 11:11 as I first shared this. Gotta love it!!

I FEEL YOU

I feel you
Your sun it shines
I feel you
Within my mind
You take me there
You take me where the kingdom comes
You take me to and lead me through
Babylon
This is the morning of our love
It’s just the dawning of our love
I feel you
Your heart it sings
I feel you
The joy it brings
Where Heaven waits
Those golden gates and back again
You take me to and lead me through
Oblivion
This is the morning of our love
It’s just the dawning of our love
I feel you
Your precious soul and I am whole
I feel you
Your rising sun, my kingdom comes
I feel you
Each move you make
I feel you
Each breath you take
Where Angel’s sing
And spread their wings, my love’s on high
You take me home
To glory’s throne by and by
This is the morning of our love
This is the dawning of our love
This is the morning of our love
It’s just the dawning of our love

~ “I Feel You” by Depeche Mode

Songwriters
ARNOLD, BRADLEY KIRK / ROBERTS, MATTHEW DARRICK / HENDERSON, CHRISTOPHER LEE / HARRELL, ROBERT TODD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTKJ_itifQg

Wow…. I love this song… I love how it arrived in my life, and I love all the layers of meaning and messages it conveys…. for us ALL. xo Wowza! ~~~~ I FEEL YOU. Love, Always, DeAnne
 

Love Bomb

It's Loaded

LOVE is my weapon of CHOICE.

It IS loaded, and I am not afraid to use it. 
LOVE BOMBS AWAY ~ Today and Every Day. xo

DeAnne, Conscious Connections NOW

A Dream & So Much Love

SO MUCH LOVE
Perusing my writings today…. I came across this dream that I had ten days ago. It followed three weeks after a communication gone badly with a soul friend, a person who has been a catalyst in my life. I learned so much from that. I honed my core, my inner resolve, my discernment, my boundaries, my forgiveness, my strength and my authentic truth. It was painful yet purposeful.

I find I am so capable of carrying and flowing enormous love.  In life, in death, in everything, only love remains. ❤

This was a beautiful loving dream of understanding shared between each of us. Though our very human selves fumble at times, all of us, the call to truly love ourselves and share love with others is ultimate truth.  This dream felt like an acknowledgment of that. No matter what comes of this now, whether our friendship is eventually restored in fullness here or lovingly let go by each of us, Love remains. Spirits and Souls know that. I’ll trust the unfolding.

Here is my dream of my soul friend and I:

The energies flowed between us and so much was shared.

I dreamt that she was sitting at a breakfast table with me. Her hair was in soft curls and lit from behind by the morning sun. Though her eyes squinted, her presence was much softer. As I gazed at her, the sun shone golden behind her and gave a soft shadowing to her face. She wanted to connect with me. There was still a slight edge but much more softness to her.

We exchanged our views easily, and she commented that we needed a sense of closure. That was how the dream ended.

On the day of this dream I attended a funeral service for a friend’s father, and later I went with dear friends to the panel discussion “Does It Matter if Jesus Had a Wife?” at the university. Synchronicity abounded. Deep conversations were shared. I learned of a friend’s mother’s death that morning. I would learn of another mother’s death the next morning.  It is such a reminder to love while we are here.

Interestingly, my teenage daughter had had a dream just a week before of this same soul friend reuniting with me in our home. In her dream, we two were apologizing to one another, sitting on the couch talking with heartfelt focus and then “hugging it out.”

Dreams, waking moments of meaning… all of it stirs wonder.  I let go of the outcome.

There is a divine orchestration. I am honoring it, trusting and appreciating.. Behind it all is SO MUCH LOVE…..

I’ll Stand By You

I awoke this morning with this song playing over…. and over… and over… again inside me… “I’ll Stand By You.”

I began to hear it as the Beloved singing to me, for me.
LISTEN.  Imagine the Divine conveying every word and each feeling just for You. ❤

That, that is how unconditionally we are truly loved. Wow…. I will be walking through the world today feeling that Truth more deeply. Love to you all, D*

Oh, why you look so sad?
Tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now
Don’t be ashamed to cry
Let me see you through
’cause I’ve seen the dark side too
When the night falls on you
You don’t know what to do
Nothing you confess
Could make me love you less

I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you

So if you’re mad, get mad
Don’t hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now
Hey, what you got to hide?
I get angry too
Well I’m a lot like you
When you’re standing at the crossroads
And don’t know which path to choose
Let me come along
’cause even if you’re wrong

I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
Take me in, into your darkest hour
And I’ll never desert you
I’ll stand by you

And when…
When the night falls on you, baby
You’re feeling all alone
You won’t be on your own

I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you

I’ll stand by you
Take me in, into your darkest hour
And I’ll never desert you
I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you

~ The Pretenders

Stand in the Center of Your Beingness

Stand.In.Center.Your.Beingness

Many of us have enormous hearts and big visions.  We long to see people living their fullest expressions united together in genuine collaboration with mutual trust, authenticity and acceptance while working together toward common goals.  Many of us are continually taking action and creating this in our personal lives, communities and careers.  I am.

This vision begins… within.  Many of my colleagues and friends are embracing their own empowerment. They are continuously learning, teaching and modeling the “true power” that comes from withIN.  We are in a time now for discovering this power inside ourselves, each and every ONE of us.

It’s also true that ‘discernment’ is key.  Empowerment relies upon us listening to and heeding the direction of our own inner compass.  Others may not respond well to this.  They may truly prefer us unempowered.  We must empower ourselves anyway and learn to collaborate.  I had many lessons around this in 2013 and the early days of 2014 and witnessed many more. This is not always easy to navigate and those who teach it are continuously learning themselves.

One instance, one lesson in particular, was immensely challenging for me personally.  I know I will continue learning and growing from it for a very long while to come.  I also know now that even though my heart may carry a true message (of healing community, allowing forgiveness and renewing love) I must be clear and discerning about how, where and when I share it.  I did not do this entirely well in that instance and yet I trust some universal plan has unfolded.  It seems it had to happen.  I am called now from deep within to truly walk my talk now.  I bless that situation with Love and let go.  The energy of possibility and limitless love allows for so much that I cannot see.  I will trust that. I will act now from renewed integrity to myself and others.  My inner compass is recalibrated.  I appreciate what I have shared and learned. Now, life moves forward. There is no going back to what was. There is only what IS and creating what will BE.

I know I can choose and continue to choose to believe in people and the higher vision while being discerning in the day-to-day living of life. Trusting my own intelligence and inner hit of intuition is key and all of us are learning that more and more.  As I wrote in a personal post weeks ago, I have never in my life burned any bridges. Relationships flow and change with the fluid nature of Life and growth, within us and around us. May we always bless them with love. They may be only for a reason or a season or they may return to us with renewal. Let us remain open to possibility yet always true to our own knowing, our own inner compass.

We all continuously learn and grow yet must always take responsibility for the energy we bring into each moment of life and give out to others in thought, word and deed.

Love is the constant and the ultimate truth to live by. Kindness is key.  What we do to others, we do to ourselves.  It’s time to realize how truly interconnected we are. We have got to walk our talk!

One of my dearest friends, Edgy Mystic Melynnda, a trusted colleague/peer/mentor/sister/friend, said to me in early December 2013, “All that triggers separation is not from Source. Stand in the center of your Beingness.”   That phrase of wise insight simply poured through her. THAT was empowering and a powerful validation at the time. It continues to be.

Stand.In.Center.Your.Beingness

My own father once told me I was THE most nonjudgmental person he has ever known. One of my best friends agreed yet told me I had often saved all of my judgment for myself. Now, I have had a lifetime of learning about the energy of judgment.  I simply can’t inflict that type of violence on others or myself anymore.  Intentional loving choices prevail more now, from the inside out for me. There’s plenty of imperfection along with plenty of gentle strength, integrity, ever-deepening wisdom and profound love.

I will continue to renew and do this.  May we all “stand in the center of our own Beingness.”

It’s truly empowering to know we get to choose for ourselves, every moment of every day, with every thought, every word and every action. We are that powerful. We get to choose.

I CHOOSE LOVE….. over and over and over again in every moment that I can…..

I choose to create from that place and collaborate with others who make that same choice.

I CHOOSE LOVE.

Now let’s create that world we envision, one choice at a time, together.